Courtesy of Tongue Tied

November 30, 2004

High Irony



A Georgia principal who read a satirical ditty about how kids today can elect pregnant prom queens and dress like freaks but can’t mention God in school was accused of breaching that pesky line between church and state, reports the Associated Press.

Tommy Craft, principal of Cedar Shoals High School in Athens, apologized for reading a poem entitled called The New School Prayer over the school's intercom. He said he just wanted to provoke a little thought.

But because the poem sounded sorta like a prayer and mentioned God, some parents complained. “Basically, I found the poem offensive, but even if I didn't, I still would believe it crossed the line between church and state,'' said Ginger Smith, whose daughter is a junior at Cedar Shoals.

The poem has circulated on the Internet since at least 1992 and is written in the rhyming style of the children's prayer that begins Now I lay me down to sleep. It goes like this:

Now I sit me down in school

Where praying is against the rule

For this great nation under God

Finds mention of Him very odd.

If Scripture now the class recites,

It violates the Bill of Rights.

And anytime my head I bow

Becomes a Federal matter now.

Our hair can be purple, orange or green,

That's no offense; it's a freedom scene.

The law is specific, the law is precise.

Prayers spoken aloud are a serious vice.

For praying in a public hall

Might offend someone with no faith at all.

In silence alone we must meditate,

God's name is prohibited by the state.

We're allowed to cuss and dress like freaks,

And pierce our noses, tongues and cheeks.

They've outlawed guns, but FIRST the Bible.

To quote the Good Book makes me liable.

We can elect a pregnant Senior Queen,

And the ``unwed daddy,'' our Senior King.

It's ``inappropriate'' to teach right from wrong,

We're taught that such ``judgments'' do not belong.

We can get our condoms and birth controls,

Study witchcraft, vampires and totem poles.

But the Ten Commandments are not allowed,

No word of God must reach this crowd.

It's scary here I must confess,

When chaos reigns the school's a mess.

So, Lord, this silent plea I make:

Should I be shot, my soul please take!